Thursday, September 28, 2017

How to Get Your Husband to Empty the Dishwasher and Other Secrets of Life

I think I just had this epiphany.  I like to be right.  That's not the epiphany. Anyone who really knows me will say, "duh" to that one.  Of course, I would argue that they are wrong.  Ha, ha, ha just kidding (maybe not).

Here is the epiphany.  My pursuit of being right, gets in the way of me getting what I want so many

Sunday, September 17, 2017

The Road to Self Care Starts Here!

PLUS 44 Other Ideas to Get You Started


Self-Care is the new buzz word.  In fact according to a NPR article, "The Millennial Obsession with Self Care" Millennials make more personal improvement commitments and spend twice as much in the pursuit of self-care than any other generation, especially in the area of workout regime, diet plans, life coaching, therapy and apps to improve personal well being.

The question is...Why?

Is this a problem/solution of our own making or just the solution to a busy lifestyle that often leaves us feeling self neglected?  This is the generation that has grown up in the age of the internet and social media.  It has never been easier to find information on any topic and never have we been so bombarded by images of impossible high standards.  We are no longer keeping up the the Jones'. We are now keeping up with the Kardashians (and a slew of other celebrities).

On the other hand, never has mental illness gotten so much attention, and we are at a point where the stigma surrounding it is at it's lowest point ever (although we still have a loooong way to go), so people are more willing than ever to seek the help that they need.  Self-care is seen as one way to address anxiety, depression and other illnesses or to help guard against them, and the internet provides almost endless possibilities and ideas on self-care.

Friday, September 15, 2017

How Lying to Yourself Can Make You Kinder to Others

You know how there are these little phrases that you've hear all your life, and you nod your head in understanding every time you hear it, then one day when you hear it for the 556th time you suddenly really get it, like as in an honest to goodness 'aha' moment?  I had one of these flashes of insight this morning.

I was mulling over a problem a friend of mine was going through.  A friend who always seems to have their shit really together.  They are funny, smart, successful many times over, in a happy relationship, living in a great place.  In other words, seemingly "perfect".  Yet, not perfect.  They have a loved one struggling, and a family at odds about the best way to handle the situation.  So the phrase "Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about.  Be Kind - Always" or "Everyone is struggling at something, some are just better at hiding it than others." popped into my head, and I was like "Wow, that really is true."

Every time I've heard it, I've nodded my head "yes, of course" and went about my day.  Of course I "get it", but I don't know if I ever really, I mean really thought about it to the extent that I not only intellectually understood, but I felt it.  Everyone really does have something that they will have to deal with that isn't pretty.  We all have some mess in our life that we are hiding in the proverbial closet.  Some of us have hall closets, and some have that huge room-sized walk-in closet of mess with several sections, that we are dealing with.
Compassion and Empathy
The difference is when I intellectually understood it, I didn't internalize it, so I would then find myself subconsciously (maybe consciously) judging.  For example, you know when you pass someone on the highway, and then maybe you forget to get right back into the driving lane, then you look behind you and see this A**hole riding your bumper, flashing his lights at you to move over? See? Judging - only a**holes drive like that.  Or, the surly checkout person is just mean.  Glad you don't have to work with her.

Saturday, September 9, 2017

Project Night Owl to Morning Lark: What Worked & What Didn't Round 1

SPOILER ALERT: I suck at this, but I learned a lot.....

Night Routines
Becoming a Morning Person

I picked this Ostrich because it is neither a owl or a lark, AND this ostrich face just looks like it saying to me, "Ummm hmmm, I know your excuses and I'll have none of them, get your ass out there and try again."  Ok, I'm trying. I really am, yet I just can't seem to get into a groove that allows me to stick to a routine.  Maybe the problem is that in the summer, there is no routine.  I get a little more lax with everything.  I have more than my usual 1 glass of wine.  The kids and I stay up later watching movies, playing Minecraft, and just enjoying the fact that we DON'T have a routine that we are a slave to.  I was starting to get back in a groove when Hurricane Harvey hit and the kids were out of school for another two weeks.  However, Monday is our last day home, then it is back to the grind. Back to a routine, so I will try again.

I was feeling a little down on myself for the total lack of progress, then I remembered this little statistic from Men's Health.  It takes the average smoker almost 30 tries before they finally kick the habit.  I've been a night owl my whole life.  I'm biologically pre-disposed (it would seem), so I'm not sweating it as long as I am learning along the way.  So, here is what I've discovered so far.