Tuesday, November 6, 2018

No Complaining Challenge Day 21: Implementing "The Cure"


Well, the no complaining challenge has been a struggle for me. Mostly because I have too much else going on, and haven't been giving it the attention it needs (meaning, normal everyday life is distracting me, and I forget I'm trying to do this no complaining challenge thing). 

So, I goal without a plan is just a wish, right? or something like that.  So, action is called for this week.

I have been passively observing the complaining and not complaining and that has been okay. I have also observed how much those around me complain, and have tried to reform both my husband and my children, and may I say, their gratitude has been strongly lacking.

However, and much as I would like to cure my loved ones of their complaining, rule #1, you can't change anyone but yourself.

Since I have not been doing a great job on always catching myself in the midst of complaining, unless I am on a major venting rant (more on venting next week), I am going to try the gratitude thing with the hope being that gratitude will replace complaining as my auto response.  I believe practicing gratitude will be the cure to complaining. 

The key is to make feeling grateful a habit the same way complaining has become a habit. It is far easier to replace a habit than to stop it.

To develop a habit one has to be consistent. Makes sense because by definition a habit is something that you do over and over again without thinking.

However, if you recall, I am having trouble remembering to do this in the first place, so I need to make it easy. It takes time to build up those gratitude muscles (or build those neuron bridges), and since I know that life will get in the way, I will dedicate some time to working on those gratitude muscles.

The best way to make sure that you work on your new habit is to link it to some habit you already have. I journal in the morning, so that is a habit that I already have established. I'll leave myself a little sticky note on my journal to remember to reflect for a minute on what I am grateful for.

I also want to do this at dinner as well. We have the habit of eating together, so why not make this part of our dinner conversation? All too often we talk about what went wrong in our day, and this would be a good reminder of what also went right, no matter how small.

Some like to do a gratitude list at the end of the day, and if that works for you, go for it.  If you are a planner type person and spend some time each day planning out what to do the next (even if it is a work planner, I still think you can link it if it is something you do consistently), then maybe this is a good time for you to take a minute to remember what is right in your world.

Other articles in the No Complaining Challenge:
The 30 days to No Complaining Challenge
How to Make Complaining Work for You